How To Date Someone With Fearful Avoidant Attachment Or read one of the books, you know the monogamous books on attachment theory, there's some some really great ones, right? Polyamory. Here is a summary of the Fearful-Avoidant insecure attachment style: It's fairly uncommon, only around 2% of people have it. Using her nested model of attachment and trauma, she expands our understanding of how emotional experiences can influence our relationships. Shadow can be described as the repressed traits and qualities that we are either triggered by or are not good at embodying and bringing to life witin ourselves, or are even afraid of. Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy ... For example, insecure-avoidant partners will want to avoid fights and conflicts. The Poly Priestess Podcast | Podcasts on Audible | Audible.com Understanding attachment styles will help you identify why you do or do not connect in secure and healthy ways in your relationship. This article reviews the history of attachment theory, outlines four adult attachment styles . Whether you're a therapist, an academic, or simply a loving partner looking to improve your own relationships, it will give you plenty of new perspectives. March 25, 2021. Use features like bookmarks, note taking and highlighting while reading Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy. Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy ... Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy ... Part 3 159. Please return the home page for information about upcoming programs.. Presenter Bio: Jessica Fern is a Psychotherapist, Certified Clinical Trauma Professional, and author of the book Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and NonMonomgamy. They're reluctant to develop a close romantic relationship, yet at the same time, they have a dire need to feel loved by others. Jessica Fern explains why attachment is important; what fosters a secure attachment; what creates an insecure attachment; the 4 types of attachment systems, and she has an insight about the Highly Sensitive Person and attachment. 12:00 - 1:30 PM. We can use this community to support one another to gain secure attachment within. One of the most important insights is that secure attachment is a product of relationship experiences, rather than relationship structures." Attachment Theory & ENM - an exploration of Ethical NonMonogamy in the context of trauma. Jessica Fern - Polysecure. It provides nonmonogamous people with a new set of tools to navigate the complexities of multiple loving relationships, and offers radical new concepts that are sure to influence the conversation about attachment theory. Mental Health. Episode 109: The Power of Attachment Styles and the Highly ... Childhood to Adulthood Attachment Styles We talk about the basics of attachment theory and how to challenge the inherent mononormativity in it in order to apply it to nonmonogamy, especially polyamory. ‎Therapist Jessica Fern joins Tristan Taormino to talk about her new book Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Consensual Nonmonogamy. Understanding Attachment & How It Affects Your Relationships Jessica Fern is a psychotherapist, public speaker and trauma and relationship expert.In her international private practice, Jessica works with individuals, couples and people in multiple-partner relationships who no longer want to be limited by their reactive patterns, cultural conditioning, insecure attachment styles and past traumas, helping them to embody new possibilities in life and love. Polysecure is both a trailblazing theoretical treatise and a practical guide. What if, like many people, you're striving for secure, happy attachments with more than one partner . Chapter 9 The S in Hearts-Secure Attachment with Self 197. Dating. Jessica Fern is a psychotherapist, author, public speaker and trauma and relationship expert. In its most basic sense, attachment types can get broken down to secure, and insecure attachment. Hi, all. To start, let me say that secure attachment with multiple romantic partners is possible. Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Consensual Nonmonogamy with Jessica Fern, M.S. Her new book Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy* explores healthy attachments through a refreshingly non-traditional lens. Any style of attachment — other than secure attachment — can lead to trauma. The insecure-avoidant partner will . TITLE. by Jessica Fern Paperback. Then, she sets out six specific strategies to help you move toward secure attachments in your multiple relationships. 15 talking about this. But hold up, monogamy-minded folks! The Ethical Slut, Third Edition: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships, and Other Freedoms in Sex and Love. relationship structures and attachment style quiz. Above is a stone birdbath with bright pinks flowers floating in the water, and two . It calls for careful consideration, and clear communication, of varying attachment needs. This is a place for us to discuss attachment theory and styles in the context of CNM (Consensual Non-monogamy). Effy and Jacqueline are joined by Jessica Fern, a psychotherapist, public speaker, and trauma and relationship expert, and the author of Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy to discuss attachment styles and trauma and how they impact our relationship structures and sexuality. Chapter 5 Attachment and Nonmonogamy 117. Amanda Giles. the different attachment styles in childhood, and how the names of the insecure styles change in adulthood. "Polysecure is likely to become for people interested in polyamory, what Love Languages is for understanding romance. This research doesn't mean we're doomed by tough childhoods. . In her international private practice, Jessica works with individuals, couples and people in multiple-partner relationships who no longer want to be limited by their reactive patterns, cultural conditioning, insecure attachment styles, and past traumas . Fearful avoidant attachment style means that a person feels both an anxious need for another, and an urge to evade intimacy. For example, they will say "OK" to your questions, which is a way to stop the conversation. by Janet W. Hardy Paperback. Sent from and sold by Amazon. At the bottom is a vintage illustration of a triangle and two hands, with long fingernails, facing up with the backs of the palms facing the viewer. Then, she sets out six specific strategies to help you move toward secure attachments in your multiple relationships. It's difficult to talk about relationships these days without the topic of Attachment Styles coming up. One of the most important insights is that secure attachment is a product of relationship experiences, rather than relationship structures." Dec 29 2021. relationship structures and attachment style quiz / Posted By / Comments honolulu magazine cover kid contest . Jessica is a trusted friend and contributor to the Leveled Up Love community. The Power of Attachment Styles and the Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) GUEST. But hold up, monogamy-minded folks! Jessica Fern is a psychotherapist, public speaker and trauma and relationship expert.In her international private practice, Jessica works with individuals, couples and people in multiple-partner relationships who no longer want to be limited by their reactive patterns, cultural conditioning, insecure attachment styles and past traumas, helping them to embody new possibilities in life and love. Chapter 6 The Importance of Attachment in Consensual Nonmonogamy 127. Allowing yourself to be dependent on others; Words are incongruous to their actions (e.g., does/says one . I've been wanting to have a conversation around attachment theory and the various attachment styles on the podcast for a long time, and I knew as soon as I started reading Polysecure that I needed to have Jessica on to break it all down. One of the most important insights is that secure attachment is a product of relationship experiences, rather than relationship . You'll want to pay close attention as insecure attachment styles can sabotage any relationship; we either feel safe and secure within them, within ourselves , or . Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy Paperback - October 23, 2020 by Jessica Fern (Author), Eve Rickert (Foreword), Nora Samaran (Foreword) Attachment theory has entered the mainstream, but most discussions focus on how we can cultivate secure monogamous relationships. I am securely attached to my husband, but anxious with other partners. [Image ID: A collage made by Margeaux. I have read Attached and Polysecure, and am jn therapy to address the root of this. The ability to regulate one's emotions isn't built in. "Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Consensual Nonmonogamy" by Jessica Fern . We can use this community to support one another to gain secure attachment within ourselves and anyone we partner with, and create a new model of healthy conscious relating. There are four main attachment styles: secure, anxious, avoidant, and fearful-avoidant (aka disorganized), and they all result in different behavior and approaches when it comes to relationships.. As licensed marriage and family therapist Shane Birkel, LMFT, tells mbg, attachment theory comes down to someone's earliest . €18.00. On February 7, we will be covering Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy by Jessica Fern . Attachment Styles and Trauma. Attachment style and partner's marriage. Having traumas over my pregnancy created fear, distress and discomfort on her which triggered her attachment system to be activated. PolyPriestess Podcast Lost Episode: Polysecure with Jessica Fern Jul 28 2021 On this special lost episode, Rev. Basics of Attachment Theory Joseph A. Shaub Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Attorney at Law PowerPoint distributed at the program and also available for download in electronic format: 1. Jessica Fern, the author of Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy, discusses attachment styles and provides practical advice on how to create secure attachments on this week's edition of the Multiamory podcast. Her new book Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy * explores healthy attachments through a refreshingly non-traditional lens. Attachment Styles and Their Impact on Divorce and Parenting Eventbrite - Smart Sluts presents A Talk with Jessica Fern, author of PolySecure - Sunday, April 18, 2021 - Find event and ticket information. As many recent studies find, it's completely possible to repair these wounds . Posted by 1 minute ago. As a child we feel afraid, threatened and in need of closeness. April 2, 2021. Whether you're a therapist, an academic, or simply a loving partner looking to improve your own relationships, it will give you plenty of new perspectives. A short but w lovely book for fans of both authors, but also a lot of insight into freedom of speach, creativity and… — Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy BY Jessica . DOI: 10.1016/J.JRP.2010.05.007 Corpus ID: 52023077. Jessica Fern, MS. 4.55 (1,532 ratings by Goodreads) Paperback. . Fern takes a compassionate approach to CNM and all the attachment styles, providing guidance for navigating the issues that arise. Praise For Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy …. She is the author of Polysecure, a book that focuses on creating emotionally intimate and securely attached relationships with multiple partners. This item: Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy. Polysecure is the first book to explicitly translate the principles of attachment theory to nonmonogamous relationships. The percentages of each style are also noted. Polysecure is both a trailblazing theoretical treatise and a practical guide. Love & Marriage. Episode #122: Breaking Down Attachment Styles with Jessica Fern. Like all insecure attachment styles, it is an unconscious strategy to survive very early childhood trauma (age 1-2). By (author) Jessica Fern , Foreword by Eve Rickert , Foreword by Nora Samaran. Chapter 10 Common Questions and Final . Polysecure is a perfect accompaniment to "Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory" (which itself is a great substitution for "More Than Two" following the accusations against Veaux). Fern takes a compassionate approach to CNM and all the attachment styles, providing guidance for navigating the issues that arise. Download it once and read it on your Kindle device, PC, phones or tablets. Attachment and Trauma Treatment Centre for Healing (ATTCH It's difficult to talk about relationships these days without the topic of Attachment Styles coming up. The Internal Forces that Compel Us: The Centrality of Attachment Electronic format only: 1. Find Out How To Identify Yours And How It Affects Your Relationships. Session Title: Polysecure This session originally aired as part of our June 2021 event and is not currently availabe. There are several different ways for psychologists to categorize adult attachment styles, but in her book, Fern breaks them out into four basic units: secure, dismissive, preoccupied, and fearful. Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy: Fern, Jessica: 9781944934989: Books - Amazon.ca You'll want to pay close attention as insecure attachment styles can sabotage any relationship; we either feel safe and secure within them, within ourselves, or . Whether you're a therapist, an academic, or simply a loving partner looking to improve your own relationships, it will give you plenty of new perspectives. Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy - Kindle edition by Fern, Jessica. The research on love and relationships consistently finds that understanding our attachment style can be an important part of creating . I've been wanting to have a conversation around attachment theory and the various attachment styles on the podcast for a long time, and I knew as soon as I started reading Polysecure that I need. Alisa was only happy when she was on my chest otherwise she was a crying to get attention. Jessica Fern and attachment theory. Vote. Chapter 8 The Hearts of Being Polysecure 173. Attachment theory has entered the mainstream, but most discussions focus on how we can cultivate secure monogamous relationships. I had been researching how childhood traumas causing many challenging relationship set up for us in adulthood. On this podcast, Jessica talks about attachment theory, what it means to be securely attached, and how insecure attachment could be limiting your relationships. The following content is an excerpt from Jessica Fern's book - Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Non-monogamy. 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attachment styles polysecure

January 9, 2022by in construction of proportional counter

Firstly, attachment theory is all about how we relate to others. Then, she sets out six specific strategies to help you move toward secure attachments in your multiple relationships. This week we're joined with Jessica Fern, a psychotherapist, public speaker, and trauma and relationship expert with a private practice where she helps individuals, couples, and members of polyamorous relationships who want to move past the limitations from reactive patterns, cultural conditioning, insecure attachment styles, and past trauma in order to . It provides nonmonogamous people with a new set of tools to navigate the complexities of multiple loving relationships, and offers radical new concepts that are sure to influence the conversation about attachment theory"-- Provided by publisher. - Lyssna på Episode #122: Breaking Down Attachment Styles with Jessica Fern av Live Your F*ck Yes Life direkt i din mobil, surfplatta eller webbläsare - utan app. Disorganized attachment is the primary style for survivors of complex developmental trauma. How To Date Someone With Fearful Avoidant Attachment Or read one of the books, you know the monogamous books on attachment theory, there's some some really great ones, right? Polyamory. Here is a summary of the Fearful-Avoidant insecure attachment style: It's fairly uncommon, only around 2% of people have it. Using her nested model of attachment and trauma, she expands our understanding of how emotional experiences can influence our relationships. Shadow can be described as the repressed traits and qualities that we are either triggered by or are not good at embodying and bringing to life witin ourselves, or are even afraid of. Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy ... For example, insecure-avoidant partners will want to avoid fights and conflicts. The Poly Priestess Podcast | Podcasts on Audible | Audible.com Understanding attachment styles will help you identify why you do or do not connect in secure and healthy ways in your relationship. This article reviews the history of attachment theory, outlines four adult attachment styles . Whether you're a therapist, an academic, or simply a loving partner looking to improve your own relationships, it will give you plenty of new perspectives. March 25, 2021. Use features like bookmarks, note taking and highlighting while reading Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy. Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy ... Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy ... Part 3 159. Please return the home page for information about upcoming programs.. Presenter Bio: Jessica Fern is a Psychotherapist, Certified Clinical Trauma Professional, and author of the book Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and NonMonomgamy. They're reluctant to develop a close romantic relationship, yet at the same time, they have a dire need to feel loved by others. Jessica Fern explains why attachment is important; what fosters a secure attachment; what creates an insecure attachment; the 4 types of attachment systems, and she has an insight about the Highly Sensitive Person and attachment. 12:00 - 1:30 PM. We can use this community to support one another to gain secure attachment within. One of the most important insights is that secure attachment is a product of relationship experiences, rather than relationship structures." Attachment Theory & ENM - an exploration of Ethical NonMonogamy in the context of trauma. Jessica Fern - Polysecure. It provides nonmonogamous people with a new set of tools to navigate the complexities of multiple loving relationships, and offers radical new concepts that are sure to influence the conversation about attachment theory. Mental Health. Episode 109: The Power of Attachment Styles and the Highly ... Childhood to Adulthood Attachment Styles We talk about the basics of attachment theory and how to challenge the inherent mononormativity in it in order to apply it to nonmonogamy, especially polyamory. ‎Therapist Jessica Fern joins Tristan Taormino to talk about her new book Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Consensual Nonmonogamy. Understanding Attachment & How It Affects Your Relationships Jessica Fern is a psychotherapist, public speaker and trauma and relationship expert.In her international private practice, Jessica works with individuals, couples and people in multiple-partner relationships who no longer want to be limited by their reactive patterns, cultural conditioning, insecure attachment styles and past traumas, helping them to embody new possibilities in life and love. Polysecure is both a trailblazing theoretical treatise and a practical guide. What if, like many people, you're striving for secure, happy attachments with more than one partner . Chapter 9 The S in Hearts-Secure Attachment with Self 197. Dating. Jessica Fern is a psychotherapist, author, public speaker and trauma and relationship expert. In its most basic sense, attachment types can get broken down to secure, and insecure attachment. Hi, all. To start, let me say that secure attachment with multiple romantic partners is possible. Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Consensual Nonmonogamy with Jessica Fern, M.S. Her new book Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy* explores healthy attachments through a refreshingly non-traditional lens. Any style of attachment — other than secure attachment — can lead to trauma. The insecure-avoidant partner will . TITLE. by Jessica Fern Paperback. Then, she sets out six specific strategies to help you move toward secure attachments in your multiple relationships. 15 talking about this. But hold up, monogamy-minded folks! The Ethical Slut, Third Edition: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships, and Other Freedoms in Sex and Love. relationship structures and attachment style quiz. Above is a stone birdbath with bright pinks flowers floating in the water, and two . It calls for careful consideration, and clear communication, of varying attachment needs. This is a place for us to discuss attachment theory and styles in the context of CNM (Consensual Non-monogamy). Effy and Jacqueline are joined by Jessica Fern, a psychotherapist, public speaker, and trauma and relationship expert, and the author of Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy to discuss attachment styles and trauma and how they impact our relationship structures and sexuality. Chapter 5 Attachment and Nonmonogamy 117. Amanda Giles. the different attachment styles in childhood, and how the names of the insecure styles change in adulthood. "Polysecure is likely to become for people interested in polyamory, what Love Languages is for understanding romance. This research doesn't mean we're doomed by tough childhoods. . In her international private practice, Jessica works with individuals, couples and people in multiple-partner relationships who no longer want to be limited by their reactive patterns, cultural conditioning, insecure attachment styles, and past traumas . Fearful avoidant attachment style means that a person feels both an anxious need for another, and an urge to evade intimacy. For example, they will say "OK" to your questions, which is a way to stop the conversation. by Janet W. Hardy Paperback. Sent from and sold by Amazon. At the bottom is a vintage illustration of a triangle and two hands, with long fingernails, facing up with the backs of the palms facing the viewer. Then, she sets out six specific strategies to help you move toward secure attachments in your multiple relationships. It's difficult to talk about relationships these days without the topic of Attachment Styles coming up. One of the most important insights is that secure attachment is a product of relationship experiences, rather than relationship structures." Dec 29 2021. relationship structures and attachment style quiz / Posted By / Comments honolulu magazine cover kid contest . Jessica is a trusted friend and contributor to the Leveled Up Love community. The Power of Attachment Styles and the Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) GUEST. But hold up, monogamy-minded folks! Jessica Fern is a psychotherapist, public speaker and trauma and relationship expert.In her international private practice, Jessica works with individuals, couples and people in multiple-partner relationships who no longer want to be limited by their reactive patterns, cultural conditioning, insecure attachment styles and past traumas, helping them to embody new possibilities in life and love. Chapter 6 The Importance of Attachment in Consensual Nonmonogamy 127. Allowing yourself to be dependent on others; Words are incongruous to their actions (e.g., does/says one . I've been wanting to have a conversation around attachment theory and the various attachment styles on the podcast for a long time, and I knew as soon as I started reading Polysecure that I needed to have Jessica on to break it all down. One of the most important insights is that secure attachment is a product of relationship experiences, rather than relationship . You'll want to pay close attention as insecure attachment styles can sabotage any relationship; we either feel safe and secure within them, within ourselves , or . Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy Paperback - October 23, 2020 by Jessica Fern (Author), Eve Rickert (Foreword), Nora Samaran (Foreword) Attachment theory has entered the mainstream, but most discussions focus on how we can cultivate secure monogamous relationships. I am securely attached to my husband, but anxious with other partners. [Image ID: A collage made by Margeaux. I have read Attached and Polysecure, and am jn therapy to address the root of this. The ability to regulate one's emotions isn't built in. "Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Consensual Nonmonogamy" by Jessica Fern . We can use this community to support one another to gain secure attachment within ourselves and anyone we partner with, and create a new model of healthy conscious relating. There are four main attachment styles: secure, anxious, avoidant, and fearful-avoidant (aka disorganized), and they all result in different behavior and approaches when it comes to relationships.. As licensed marriage and family therapist Shane Birkel, LMFT, tells mbg, attachment theory comes down to someone's earliest . €18.00. On February 7, we will be covering Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy by Jessica Fern . Attachment Styles and Trauma. Attachment style and partner's marriage. Having traumas over my pregnancy created fear, distress and discomfort on her which triggered her attachment system to be activated. PolyPriestess Podcast Lost Episode: Polysecure with Jessica Fern Jul 28 2021 On this special lost episode, Rev. Basics of Attachment Theory Joseph A. Shaub Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Attorney at Law PowerPoint distributed at the program and also available for download in electronic format: 1. Jessica Fern, the author of Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy, discusses attachment styles and provides practical advice on how to create secure attachments on this week's edition of the Multiamory podcast. Her new book Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy * explores healthy attachments through a refreshingly non-traditional lens. Attachment Styles and Their Impact on Divorce and Parenting Eventbrite - Smart Sluts presents A Talk with Jessica Fern, author of PolySecure - Sunday, April 18, 2021 - Find event and ticket information. As many recent studies find, it's completely possible to repair these wounds . Posted by 1 minute ago. As a child we feel afraid, threatened and in need of closeness. April 2, 2021. Whether you're a therapist, an academic, or simply a loving partner looking to improve your own relationships, it will give you plenty of new perspectives. A short but w lovely book for fans of both authors, but also a lot of insight into freedom of speach, creativity and… — Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy BY Jessica . DOI: 10.1016/J.JRP.2010.05.007 Corpus ID: 52023077. Jessica Fern, MS. 4.55 (1,532 ratings by Goodreads) Paperback. . Fern takes a compassionate approach to CNM and all the attachment styles, providing guidance for navigating the issues that arise. Praise For Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy …. She is the author of Polysecure, a book that focuses on creating emotionally intimate and securely attached relationships with multiple partners. This item: Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy. Polysecure is the first book to explicitly translate the principles of attachment theory to nonmonogamous relationships. The percentages of each style are also noted. Polysecure is both a trailblazing theoretical treatise and a practical guide. Love & Marriage. Episode #122: Breaking Down Attachment Styles with Jessica Fern. Like all insecure attachment styles, it is an unconscious strategy to survive very early childhood trauma (age 1-2). By (author) Jessica Fern , Foreword by Eve Rickert , Foreword by Nora Samaran. Chapter 10 Common Questions and Final . Polysecure is a perfect accompaniment to "Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory" (which itself is a great substitution for "More Than Two" following the accusations against Veaux). Fern takes a compassionate approach to CNM and all the attachment styles, providing guidance for navigating the issues that arise. Download it once and read it on your Kindle device, PC, phones or tablets. Attachment and Trauma Treatment Centre for Healing (ATTCH It's difficult to talk about relationships these days without the topic of Attachment Styles coming up. The Internal Forces that Compel Us: The Centrality of Attachment Electronic format only: 1. Find Out How To Identify Yours And How It Affects Your Relationships. Session Title: Polysecure This session originally aired as part of our June 2021 event and is not currently availabe. There are several different ways for psychologists to categorize adult attachment styles, but in her book, Fern breaks them out into four basic units: secure, dismissive, preoccupied, and fearful. Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy: Fern, Jessica: 9781944934989: Books - Amazon.ca You'll want to pay close attention as insecure attachment styles can sabotage any relationship; we either feel safe and secure within them, within ourselves, or . Whether you're a therapist, an academic, or simply a loving partner looking to improve your own relationships, it will give you plenty of new perspectives. Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy - Kindle edition by Fern, Jessica. The research on love and relationships consistently finds that understanding our attachment style can be an important part of creating . I've been wanting to have a conversation around attachment theory and the various attachment styles on the podcast for a long time, and I knew as soon as I started reading Polysecure that I need. Alisa was only happy when she was on my chest otherwise she was a crying to get attention. Jessica Fern and attachment theory. Vote. Chapter 8 The Hearts of Being Polysecure 173. Attachment theory has entered the mainstream, but most discussions focus on how we can cultivate secure monogamous relationships. I had been researching how childhood traumas causing many challenging relationship set up for us in adulthood. On this podcast, Jessica talks about attachment theory, what it means to be securely attached, and how insecure attachment could be limiting your relationships. The following content is an excerpt from Jessica Fern's book - Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Non-monogamy. 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